Tippecanoe

( a friend of mine sent this idea )

Don't Tony Roswarski and Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer look the same?


"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I'm just a caveman. I fell on some ice and later got thawed out by some of your scientists. Your world frightens and confuses me! Sometimes the honking horns of your traffic make me want to get out of my patrol car.. and run off into the fields, or wherever.. Sometimes when I get a message on my police radio, I wonder: 'Are little demons in there talking to me?' I don't know! My primitive mind can't grasp these concepts. But there is one thing I do know - when a company receives tax abatements from a city, they should be forced to provide a 'living wage' to all employees. Despite the warnings based on 'economic theory' and the experiences of other cities, I think this will be a better investment in the community. Thank you."

WLFI has been using this graphic for ever! Any story involving finance, taxes, budgets, or the economy has the same picture. At my house, we watch for it every night.

They started using this back when the US Treasury Dept. released the new $5 and $10 bills. (When was that? My five minutes of hard research turned up nothing. If an astute reader has the answer, please leave a comment.)


Update: Five more minutes of immersion in Google turned up the date. The current $5 bill was released in May of 2000.

Those bastards at VH1 have me glued to the set again! It's not that I have that much of a memory of or penchant for 80's pop culture (since I spent about half of it in college without much TV), but the commentators crack me up. It's obvious that they are "reminded of" each little nugget they share, and that they probably care as little as I do, but I dont' care. They're still funny.

Today, I heard the song "Abracadabra" by the Steve Miller Band described as "a little date-rapey" That is so outside!

So then, after the 80's show, they have another thing where they rehash nostalgic clips and make funny comments about them. Apparently, the "I Love The" series and the new True Spin aren't enough. Here's the rub, the new series mocks formulatic television, and is called SuperSecret TV Formulas. Do you think they see it? Will their own shows be featured on an upcoming episode? It's all so surreal.

I'm amazed at the bicycle riding habits of Purdue students. I see them riding all over the sidewalks. Gang - you're not twelve anymore. You can ride on the street.

Now, I'm not talking about the academic campus area where there are no streets. On 3rd street, 1st street, Grant, Stadium, Intramural, and many others, you should be using the pavement. If there is a bike lane - use it. If not, ride in the right lane about 2 feet to the left of the white line. Take the lane and follow all traffic laws. This includes stop signs!

We also need to pay attention to the side of the street we use. I was riding to my office one day, and I came across two young ladies riding towards me on their left side of the street. I politely yelled "You're on the wrong side of the road!" One of them answered in her best Jerry Springer audience member tone "I know where I'M supposed to be!" (you have to wag your finger bag and forth when you say it.) So, I ran them both off the street into a patch of thorny rose bushes. (Sorry, I've been watching Scrubs tonight, and I'm trying out my daydreaming during conversations. My wife doens't appreciate it.)

One time, I saw a guy speeding down the sidewalk, and he came up to an intersection where he needed to cross a multi-lane, one-way street. He didn't stop at all. The driver of the truck in the first lane saw him and waited, but the guy in the next lane couldn't see past the truck and started to proceed. He tapped the cyclist, who was knocked off his bike into the street. The rider was so embarrassed that he got up a pedaled away before the driver could check on him.


Something else I've seen is that many of the young ladies on bikes have the seat all of the way down. It makes my old knees hurt just looking at them. My wife tells me that women do that so that they can touch the ground with both feet when they stop. Think about it, gals. You spend almost all of your bike time with both feet on the pedals, not stopped. When you do stop, just lean to one side. The experts say that when your foot is on the pedal at its lowest point, the angle at your knee should be around 150°. That angle will give you the most power and least strain. Plus, you'll look less like a circus clown riding a 4 inch bicycle.


OK. Done ranting now.

I took my son to the Purdue Symphony Orchestra concert at Long Center on Sunday. Although he is too old to show up in a costume and get excited about a treat bag, he did enjoy the Harry Potter Suite that contained music from the first movie. There were a lot of little kids there, so one had to filter out the talking, crying, singing, and candy wrapper crinkling to hear the great performance.

One weird thing: there was a dad there (early 30s) who was wearing a very massive set of headphones with the cord going into a toaster-sized bag slung over his shoulder. I'm assuming that there was a CD player and discs inside. To complete the hip hop look, he had the left earcup covering the ear, while the right was just above.

So many questions were queueing up in my brain:

• Is he so hooked on whatever he was listening to that he couldn't take an hour to listen to a very good orchestra?
• With one ear uncovered, isn't it difficult to concentrate on anything? The music in the left ear - the live orchestra - his wife's constant yammering throughout the show?
• Was there anything in the headphones at all, or is he just a poser?
• What do those things weigh? They've got to be 3 or 4 pounds, easy.
• Did I lock the car? (My son wanted to bring in his CD player to listen to the Harry Potter soundtrack while the orchestra played other selections, but I made him leave it behind.)
• Hasn't this guy heard of MP3 players? I saw one the other day that hangs off one's key chain. Much easier to lug around than that brick he was carrying.

Regardless of all of that, the big question is what kind of message is "Uncle Cracker" sending to the kids? There is lots of great music in the world (more than just the 50 Cent, or more likely Metallica, that Dad listens too), and all types should be at least given a chance.

One more thing: the orchestra members had great costumes. They obviously put much time and thought into their outfits. We saw Queen Amadala, Albert Einstien, Tigger (as concertmaster), the Blues Brothers, and many others. I'm not sure what the girl in the black mini-skirt and halter was trying to be, but I have my ideas.

I took the kids on a bike ride along the Cattail Trail in West Lafayette. What a great setup! We had a fun time (especially climbing over the earthen barriers to play in the golf cart tunnels).


Nice work, west side!

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Synopsis of every Mr. Food segment:

• Remind us that we are short on time and that we like 'comfort food'.
  
• After noting that we can use any brands at all, rush through a recipe that is nothing we couldn't find in the back of a women's magazine or soup can inner label.
  
• Pull out a finished version of the meal, and recap the short on time point.
  
• (if it is cold outside, mention that this recipe is 'hearty')
  
• Blurt out an insipid closing line that uses the phrase 'Ooh, it's so good' in a grammatically incorrect way.
  

Now you're a TV cooking expert!

Isn't it time for WLFI to find something new for the morning news?